Atlanta is so nice and so so green, I had no idea. I get surer and surer that I am going to move back to New York, but still it’s so hard to tell what I should do. In New Orleans I always catch myself doing weird time zone addition in my head (“ok if it’s eight o’clock here, that means that it’s ACTUALLY nine”) because my heart is just still in the east and my body wishes it were too. So it feels very good to be here. Good and right to be in this sweet green place with no pull on my feelings. I don’t know I don’t know!! Last night I dreamed I was being chased through a party by a girl trying to shoot me with a water gun full of acid.

I’m on a very cold very quiet bus somewhere in Alabama — the thought of a long weekend in the haunted cat house was kind of too much to bear, so I’m going to Atlanta to see Andrea. Almost everyone else on this bus is snoring. Almost everyone else on this bus was smart enough to bring blankets. It’s too cold to sleep but also too cold for me to get carsick, so I don’t mind. The guy sitting next to me is holding both a regular fedora and a plastic party fedora on his lap. “You WILL keep the bathroom clean or I WILL shut it down,” says the conductor to somebody in the back. I’ve never been in Alabama before; in the dark it looks like anywhere and I feel so much at home.

mollitudo:


You’ve seen them, the people who don’t have teeth. You’ve seen them sleeping at bus stops and running in Cops and sitting on porches in documentaries about impossibly distant rural places. Caroline only saw the dressings the first day, the bloody netting that filled the space in her mother’s mouth where teeth should be. On the second day, her mother emerged from her bedroom without it. Her face had changed — it was shorter. The proportions were off. Her mother’s jaw lifted up too high. Her chin could now curl up almost against her nose, unobstructed. Her cheeks, normally thin, sallow things, ballooned out like jowls. Where was her mother’s face?

"A Warm Winter" by Molly McArdle | Midnight Breakfast

mollitudo:

You’ve seen them, the people who don’t have teeth. You’ve seen them sleeping at bus stops and running in Cops and sitting on porches in documentaries about impossibly distant rural places. Caroline only saw the dressings the first day, the bloody netting that filled the space in her mother’s mouth where teeth should be. On the second day, her mother emerged from her bedroom without it. Her face had changed — it was shorter. The proportions were off. Her mother’s jaw lifted up too high. Her chin could now curl up almost against her nose, unobstructed. Her cheeks, normally thin, sallow things, ballooned out like jowls. Where was her mother’s face?
"A Warm Winter" by Molly McArdle | Midnight Breakfast
Reblogged from Molly McArdle
This is one more piece of advice I have for you: don’t get impatient. Even if things are so tangled up you can’t do anything, don’t get desperate or blow a fuse and start yanking on one particular thread before it’s ready to come undone. You have to figure it’s going to be a long process and that you’ll work on things slowly, one at a time.
— Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood  (via theriverjordyn)
Reblogged from No Great Illusion
captain america: the winter soldier

omg ok GOOD POINT

just a couple of the many big & important questions in my life right now:

1. should i go back to new york or should i stay here or?????

2. what are some good romcoms i should watch? 

When his sceptical texts could find no publisher, he was frustrated. He wanted to achieve enough to know, and not just to assume, that achievement was an alluring and arduous dead end.

Lost for Words, Edward St. Aubyn

Is there anything certain writerly young males love more than the ~vacancy of ambition.~

(via haventreadthat)

when i’m a rich programmer i’m gonna publish a bimonthly magazine that’s just catherine and doskapozora talking endless perfect shit about writers of the peen variety 

(via bloomcity)

OH KATIE I CAN’T WAIT :’)

Reblogged from BLOOM CITY

thirdculturekid said: i think i may have missed something--what is/what makes a girl twerp? (i think i know what guy-twerps are [sanctimonious nerds on TV who both idolize and despise some unattainable girl--is that close?]--maybe i'm not sure of that definition either...) thanks a mil!

Hi thirdculturekid!! The original girltwerp post is here, but I am going to talk even more now! 

Your definition of the (dude) twerp is so concise and good! I’d add — and I think this is probably implicit in your formulation — that the reason the twerp is a twerp is because he feels (whether or not it is true) wounded and marginalized by like “regular people”/”the popular kids”/”the mainstream”/whatever. And the unattainable Popular Girl serves as the personification of this whole social world that the twerp both desires and despises, and she bears the brunt of all his weird social emotions.

And so it’s interesting in the case of the girl twerp, right, because rather than idolizing/despising some unattainable dude love object (the girl twerp is almost always ostensibly/canonically straight, even when actually ???), she generally also pins all these complicated social feelings onto a Popular Girl whom she both hates and idolizes. (The first television example I can think of off the top of my head is Kat Stratford/Bianca Stratford, though there are a lot more; there’s probably something to be said here about Taylor Swift and short skirts vs. t-shirts etc etc etc, but I am just not gonna be the one.) 

But so the girl twerp will always inevitably become the failed girl twerp: something about how we’re always at risk of becoming someone else’s Emblem of Mainstream Culture, something about how much that kind of sneaky self-loathing can wear on a person, something about the slow sad realization that the dude twerps were never on our side and were never going to love us anyway. I don’t know, I don’t know! Basically I was the twerpiest girl twerp and I’m still doing penance for it. Basically I’m excited to take venusboneskunkdoily's dweeb studies seminar. 

Punk #1: Oh, no, our marriage is gonna be completely platonic.

Punk #2: ??

P1: Yeah, it’s like, the first 15 minutes of every conversation we have are great, and then she just taaaaanks. Her true self comes out.

P2: ?????

P1: I’m thinking of the marriage as like, a contract to see what she gets up to. For the rest of her life.

P2: Or just be friends..?

P1: Ooohhhhhhhh no. No way. It’s not that kind of thing with us.

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:
Aries: If you start to feel restless this week, if you start to feel trapped, try to remember that it’s okay to be impulsive, it’s okay to move in circles, it’s okay to change your mind. Try to make your choices with kindness in your heart, try to move through the world trusting in the wisdom of your body, but it’s okay if you aren’t right at first. It’s okay to move backwards. It’s okay to take risks that might never pay off. Go to the beach, go to the mountains, go to the movies. Keep moving.
 Taurus: This week you’ll be able to see the future stretched out in front of you, all the way to the horizon, vast and blue as the sea. If you look at it too much, if you look too closely, it might play tricks on your vision. It might throw you off balance. There’s no map that can show you where to go, so try not to worry so much. There’s no way to see everything at once, so just keep moving and trust that the ground will stay firm under your feet, because it will.
 Gemini: This week your heart might feel so fragile, like a sunset, like a morning, like a dream. It’s going to be so easy to lose yourself in the sorrows of the world, like you could spend whole days lost inside your own head, like you could spend whole days just sighing and gazing out the window. Try to remember the ways you know to fill yourself with joy. Try to remember the ways you know to make your own light out of nothing. Try to remember to eat enough that you’ll stay strong.
 Cancer: This week there will be so many ways to know your own self, there will be so many ways to anchor yourself in this world. You can wear clothes that look like the fire you feel in your heart, you can wear clothes that match all the greens and blues of your dreams; you can wear clothes that glitter like the stars. There are so many songs you can sing, there are so many spells you can cast, there are so many ways to remind yourself of the person you most want to be.
 Leo: You might feel really driven this week, like you can do anything, like there’s nothing in this world that can stop you. You might feel lit up by all the bright energy in your limbs. You might feel like you can see all the way to the end of the world. Just don’t drive all the softness out of your heart. Don’t drive all the tenderness out of your body. Think of your best future self but still, always, think of the people all around you right now. Try to be so good to them.
 Virgo: If the streets bend all strange around you this week, if your days feel like such small brittle things, just try to breathe, try to sleep, try to drink enough water. You can slow down, if you need to, or you can stay inside all day, or you can talk to kind strangers in the park, in the store, on the bus. The future will come when it wants to, so try to enjoy your time this week. Try just to enjoy your own body. Try just to enjoy your own sweet life.
 Libra: This week, try to let your muscles get loose, try to let your thoughts wander, try not to worry too much about all your big plans. You can think of yourself like you’re made of water, you can think of yourself like you aren’t even solid. You can take on so many forms. You can move at so many different speeds. You can stay home and watch movies all week long, if you need to. You can sit on the porch and watch the sky. You can walk and walk and walk until you know what to do.
 Scorpio: This is a week for letting go of what makes you feel small, it’s a week for letting go of what makes you feel less alive. Worlds can end this week and it will not be the worst thing. Whole worlds can end this week, and you’ll be surprised at all the space that opens up to you. You can say no to so many of the thoughts that crowd inside you. You can say no to so many small cruelties. You can create so much clear bright space inside yourself that you almost start to glow.
 Sagittarius: This week’s going to feel strange and sharp and prickly, maybe, like there’s a stone in your shoe, like your clothes won’t fit right. It’s not the best and it isn’t easy, but this kind of discomfort can show you so many things, if you are patient. Try to sit with it, for now. Try to live with it. If you don’t rush to smooth everything over, if you don’t rush to fill every crack, your vision can become so clear. Your backbone can turn to steel. You can know what you need to do.
 Capricorn: This week you can find strength in the weirdest places, you can find more strength than you knew your body could hold. Listen to the bands you used to love and let them remind you of all the ways your thoughts can move. Listen to the songs you’ve always loved and let them carry you through your days. The world around you you can get so tangled and wild, but you can learn what you need to do just by moving forward. You can learn what you really want if you just keep living.
 Aquarius: This is a week for being a little tougher than you need to be, maybe, or a week for being a little weirder than you need to be, or a week for telling the truth just a little louder than you have to. It’s a week for fighting back against everything that makes you feel small, everything that makes it hard to move, everything that makes your heart feel so heavy. You can resist, this week. You can shout, you can sing, you can eat ice cream all day. You can grow into your fullest freest self.
 Pisces: This is a week for weird honesty; this is a week for trusting yourself to find a way through the space between what you have and what you need. Try to be brave enough to say your own true name out loud. Try to be brave enough to go where you haven’t been before. Try to be brave enough to believe in the quiet glowing truth in your blood. Listen to the rhythm more than the tune. Listen to the bass more than the melody. Let the world carry you.
Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May.

Hello friends, these are so late again & I’m sorry & I love you!

therumpus:

The Rumblr’s in-house astrologer, Madame Clairevoyant, presents her latest dispatch from the stars:

Aries: If you start to feel restless this week, if you start to feel trapped, try to remember that it’s okay to be impulsive, it’s okay to move in circles, it’s okay to change your mind. Try to make your choices with kindness in your heart, try to move through the world trusting in the wisdom of your body, but it’s okay if you aren’t right at first. It’s okay to move backwards. It’s okay to take risks that might never pay off. Go to the beach, go to the mountains, go to the movies. Keep moving.

Taurus: This week you’ll be able to see the future stretched out in front of you, all the way to the horizon, vast and blue as the sea. If you look at it too much, if you look too closely, it might play tricks on your vision. It might throw you off balance. There’s no map that can show you where to go, so try not to worry so much. There’s no way to see everything at once, so just keep moving and trust that the ground will stay firm under your feet, because it will.

Gemini: This week your heart might feel so fragile, like a sunset, like a morning, like a dream. It’s going to be so easy to lose yourself in the sorrows of the world, like you could spend whole days lost inside your own head, like you could spend whole days just sighing and gazing out the window. Try to remember the ways you know to fill yourself with joy. Try to remember the ways you know to make your own light out of nothing. Try to remember to eat enough that you’ll stay strong.

Cancer: This week there will be so many ways to know your own self, there will be so many ways to anchor yourself in this world. You can wear clothes that look like the fire you feel in your heart, you can wear clothes that match all the greens and blues of your dreams; you can wear clothes that glitter like the stars. There are so many songs you can sing, there are so many spells you can cast, there are so many ways to remind yourself of the person you most want to be.

Leo: You might feel really driven this week, like you can do anything, like there’s nothing in this world that can stop you. You might feel lit up by all the bright energy in your limbs. You might feel like you can see all the way to the end of the world. Just don’t drive all the softness out of your heart. Don’t drive all the tenderness out of your body. Think of your best future self but still, always, think of the people all around you right now. Try to be so good to them.

Virgo: If the streets bend all strange around you this week, if your days feel like such small brittle things, just try to breathe, try to sleep, try to drink enough water. You can slow down, if you need to, or you can stay inside all day, or you can talk to kind strangers in the park, in the store, on the bus. The future will come when it wants to, so try to enjoy your time this week. Try just to enjoy your own body. Try just to enjoy your own sweet life.

Libra: This week, try to let your muscles get loose, try to let your thoughts wander, try not to worry too much about all your big plans. You can think of yourself like you’re made of water, you can think of yourself like you aren’t even solid. You can take on so many forms. You can move at so many different speeds. You can stay home and watch movies all week long, if you need to. You can sit on the porch and watch the sky. You can walk and walk and walk until you know what to do.

Scorpio: This is a week for letting go of what makes you feel small, it’s a week for letting go of what makes you feel less alive. Worlds can end this week and it will not be the worst thing. Whole worlds can end this week, and you’ll be surprised at all the space that opens up to you. You can say no to so many of the thoughts that crowd inside you. You can say no to so many small cruelties. You can create so much clear bright space inside yourself that you almost start to glow.

Sagittarius: This week’s going to feel strange and sharp and prickly, maybe, like there’s a stone in your shoe, like your clothes won’t fit right. It’s not the best and it isn’t easy, but this kind of discomfort can show you so many things, if you are patient. Try to sit with it, for now. Try to live with it. If you don’t rush to smooth everything over, if you don’t rush to fill every crack, your vision can become so clear. Your backbone can turn to steel. You can know what you need to do.

Capricorn: This week you can find strength in the weirdest places, you can find more strength than you knew your body could hold. Listen to the bands you used to love and let them remind you of all the ways your thoughts can move. Listen to the songs you’ve always loved and let them carry you through your days. The world around you you can get so tangled and wild, but you can learn what you need to do just by moving forward. You can learn what you really want if you just keep living.

Aquarius: This is a week for being a little tougher than you need to be, maybe, or a week for being a little weirder than you need to be, or a week for telling the truth just a little louder than you have to. It’s a week for fighting back against everything that makes you feel small, everything that makes it hard to move, everything that makes your heart feel so heavy. You can resist, this week. You can shout, you can sing, you can eat ice cream all day. You can grow into your fullest freest self.

Pisces: This is a week for weird honesty; this is a week for trusting yourself to find a way through the space between what you have and what you need. Try to be brave enough to say your own true name out loud. Try to be brave enough to go where you haven’t been before. Try to be brave enough to believe in the quiet glowing truth in your blood. Listen to the rhythm more than the tune. Listen to the bass more than the melody. Let the world carry you.

Today’s image was made specially for Madame Clairevoyant by Jen May.

Hello friends, these are so late again & I’m sorry & I love you!

Reblogged from The Rumblr

"You’re so serious, and of course I really like that, but I also really like it when you smile because it makes you look so cute! And innocent!"

100yearsoflolitude:

illhaveuknowthatiloveyou:

100yearsoflolitude:

Is Sheryl Crow the most underrated songwriter ever? Is it because of “Soak Up The Sun”? I feel like it might be and that is very unfair

YES. i am an unapologetic lover of that song “Picture” she sings with Kid Rock nevermind i am so sorry that i love that song

that song is super good

gonna be stuck in my head for the next 24+ hours, THANKS A LOT GUYS

I’m so weird right now, I’m so sad right now, I’m staying in this haunted mansion right now and the ghosts are probably gonna get me or something, idk??

I’m so weird right now, I’m so sad right now, I’m staying in this haunted mansion right now and the ghosts are probably gonna get me or something, idk??

doskapozora:

I just want to SAY, Hannah hotdoghotdoghotdoghotdog, that I look SO cute in my ~~gala~~ outfit and STILL there is nothing on this whole earth that I wanna do less than get off this gross couch, omg

Still looking v cute BUT now I’m locked out of my house, ok cool joke’s on me!!

doskapozora:

I just want to SAY, Hannah hotdoghotdoghotdoghotdog, that I look SO cute in my ~~gala~~ outfit and STILL there is nothing on this whole earth that I wanna do less than get off this gross couch, omg

Still looking v cute BUT now I’m locked out of my house, ok cool joke’s on me!!

Reblogged from MADAME CLAIREVOYANT
Ok ok good point!!! But????????? I so do not wanna hang out with drunk social workers, but at least the bro who lowkey harasses me every day is bringing his new fiance, but also I have a really delicious pizza at home? But also it smells like cat pee at home, guys, help, omg

Ok ok good point!!! But????????? I so do not wanna hang out with drunk social workers, but at least the bro who lowkey harasses me every day is bringing his new fiance, but also I have a really delicious pizza at home? But also it smells like cat pee at home, guys, help, omg